Hello everyone! I'm very glad that I found this group.
About me - I'm in my late twenties. I didn't grow up in good circumstances, and I continued to be plagued in adulthood from things that happened when I was a child. I began to work on overcoming these issues several years ago, and around the same time I also realized I was trans and began to transition to my true gender. I experienced a rebirth and finally feel like I'm a whole person.
I discovered ayahuasca during this process, and it helped immensely with my healing. I've felt that I was destined for a spiritual path from a young age, and in the last year its only become clearer. I had a very strong feeling that I was called to healing work, and that I could help bring plant medicines to other people so they could experience the healing that I did.
I began to learn from mentors with an organization that has the legal right to use plant medicines in the US (Im sure many of you know what I'm talking about). However, after doing some of my own research especially in these forums, it looks like some of the people involved with this organization are fraudulent and may not be who they say they are. This is very upsetting and troubling to me.
I joined because I'm looking for advice and guidance. I am not Native American, and I don't pass myself off as one. I find it disgusting when people do this, and I have absolutely no wish to participate in cultural appropriation. I have a lot of respect for the spiritual wisdom of the Native American nations that I know of, and what I know of it makes sense to me in a way that many other traditions don't - even know I'm aware there's plenty I still have to learn. The sacred relationship to Nature is not as central to Judeo-Christianity. I also like the fact that many Native American nations actually respect and accept trans people, rather than ostracizing them and attacking them, which is not the case with most other cultures. So I guess I'm wondering if there's a way to respectfully learn and practice Native American spirituality. Not because I wish to be Native American myself - but because I live on the North American continent and it seems to be the best way to understand the land that I find myself in and its history.
I've tried to keep an open mind as I come across people who present themselves as healers, medicine people, shamans, etc. But I cant ignore the inauthentic feeling I get from many of them, and what I've found in this forum only reinforces it. Many of these people charge money for their services, which not only seems unnatural and perverse to me, but flies in the face of tradition as well.
Some of the things I've learned during this process ring true - such as mending my relationship with Nature, and conducting myself as an upright person. I can't deny this, even if some of the people I learned from are not going about things the right way. I wish I could claim a tradition, but the fact is I'm a mutt, and I can't claim to be any one thing - not even white European. My Father's side of the family has roots in Siberia, and I could follow a Siberian shamanistic tradition - but I wasnt raised with these ways, any more than I was raised with American Native ways, so I dont know that it would necessarily be any better. Many Indigenous cultures had a lot of wisdom, especially when it comes to humans relationship to Mother Earth - is it disrespectful if I try to learn from them, or is there a way to do it right? I've considered that it might be better to just invent my own traditions, since I'm a mutt, but this seems like it could be equally disrespectful if not more so. Plus, having some sort of spiritual community is important to me. I really do hope there is a way I can follow the calling to plant medicines and Nature-based healing work, but doing it in a respectful way.
Again, I'm really glad I found this forum - thank you all for the work and research you do, and I look forward to any advice that might come my way. This is not an easy issue and I've grappling with it for a while now.
Blessings,
Shalom
